Nashville Predators Holiday List – 25 Days of Predsmas: Week 3
A new rivalry is born?
To the Arizona Coyotes,
Our rivalry is relatively new, whether you date it back to 2012 beating us in the Stanley Cup Playoffs to advance to the Western Conference Finals, or most recently, bouncing us in the Stanley Cup Qualifiers.
While our vitriol for you may not be as great as it is for other rivals, make no mistake that the rivalry is growing.
What’s more frustrating is that casual NHL fans consider our franchises kindred spirits of sorts – we are not. Sure, we’re both in “nontraditional markets”, but our franchise has been one of stability; we’ve had the same General Manager since inception, only three head coaches, and we’ve been consistently competitive.
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You? Well, you go through coaches and GMs like Santa’s elves go through wrapping paper and scotch tape. You have dips where people forget you’ve even had recent success.
Seeing you in the playoffs is like seeing a distant cousin you only see at major family events every several years. It’s honestly been a miracle you’ve managed to stay in Arizona with all the relocation talk (but this writer is glad you did).
May your holiday season provide you with a coach that actually lasts longer than most gym memberships.
Expansion team drama
To the Vegas Golden Knights,
Many wouldn’t consider us rivals. Hell, I’m not sure this writer would. But we’ve got beef, and it’s time we say what everyone else is thinking: it must be nice to have been an expansion franchise with the current expansion rules, because you had it easy. You got a Hall-of-Fame goaltender in Marc-Andre Fleury, but you also took the real-deal-James-Neal from us.
When your entire team is made up of second and third line guys its first year, and you get plenty of cap room to make things happen, it’s no wonder you’re a Stanley Cup contender.
The problem is, it shouldn’t be that easy. Some franchises actually had to work to get to where they are today. You’re like the favorite grandchild born on third base whose parents buy you whatever you want, while your cousins don’t even get an allowance.
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We’d wish you success, but honestly you don’t deserve it – not yet. You haven’t even experienced your first lockout (but you probably will soon, it’s a right of passage).
All this to say, until you’ve gone through actual growing pains, take all the seats. We respect the energy of your fanbase, but we don’t respect your franchise. Maybe someday we will, but today is not that day.
May your holiday season provide you with some credibility, earned through hardship – you’re due.
Still bitter….
To the Pittsburgh Penguins,
You know what you did. The 2017 Stanley Cup Final s still fresh on our minds, and though we should have earned your respect, for some reason it feels like we still don’t have it.
Let us not forget we took you to six games, and if it hadn’t been for injuries to Ryan Johansen and Kevin Fiala, maybe we would’ve taken it to the full seven games.
At the same time, your golden boy, Sidney Crosby, is nothing but a baby-back…no, it’s the holidays and while this may be a festivus, I’m not going to lower myself to the language you deserve. He should have been suspended for the crap he pulled against P.K. Subban.
If Crosby’s name was any other, if he wasn’t who he is, he would’ve been suspended. At the least, he would’ve been fined.
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It’s not that we don’t respect you; it’s that you’re the favorite child. You get everything you want and then some, and nobody bats an eye. You’re one of the “original six”, in a “traditional” market, and because of that, of course the league will go easier on you and your players.
Some of us aren’t so lucky. The thing is, you know where you stand in the eyes of the league, and you’re so darn smug about it.
May your holiday season bring you a hardy dose of humble pie you so deserve, and may Crosby never lift another Stanley Cup.
The old fling
To the Detroit Red Wings,
Get. Over. Your. Self.
You haven’t been relevant in almost a decade, and yet your annoying fanbase still insists you’re a franchise deserving of our respect. Sure, you’re one of the original six, we get it, we’ve heard it, but give it a rest.
The Red Wings are that older sibling that peaked to soon, and likes to live in the glory days while being unemployed living in mom and dad’s basement.
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You like to make fun of our fanbase because we have our own unique traditions, and you always try to “pack” Bridgestone Arena, but while you may be able to buy tickets, you can’t seem to buy a win on the ice.
You scoff at us throwing a catfish on the ice, as if you have the market cornered because you like to throw an octopus on the ice, but at least the catfish is native to the Nashville area. Oh, an octopus is “symbolic” because of the eight wins you needed to lift the Stanley Cup back in 1952? Real cool.
Honestly, we consider you a rival, and we hope we can reignite that rivalry this upcoming season with some temporary divisional realignment, but until you pose a threat, until you can even contend for the playoffs again, how are we supposed to take you seriously?
Sure, back in the day, we threw some haymakers. Our fanbase is made up of some former Red Wings fans who were transplants to the Saturn plant from Detroit, so there’s some shared history. But as of late, you’ve done nothing to merit our attention.
May your holiday season finally bring you a playoff appearance again, just so we can watch you get bounced in the first round like the last three appearances.
To the Chicago Blackhawks,
I say this, full offense: SUCK IT. You may have made the playoffs last season in the bubble, but we still take such pride knowing that prior to that, your last appearance resulted in a 4-0 sweep by the Predators.
Eating Corey Crawford’s lunch for free, for four straight games, was and still is one of our favorite memories.
If it weren’t for a Gatorade commercial with Patrick Kane, your franchise wouldn’t even be relevant, at least not right now.
“Game Over” he said as the Predators put another one on the board.
You can’t talk about a smug fanbase without considering your smarmy bunch of mouth-breathing, sausage-smelling, sewer-dwelling fans. You’re an original six franchise? Awesome. Wow. Very cool. We literally do not care; nobody does.
You may have deserved respect a decade ago, but now? I mean, c’mon…our goalie scored a goal on you (and much love to Pekka Rinne for it).
Like the older sibling that peaked too soon, you too are relegated to mediocrity. You may not live in the basement of mom and dad’s house, but your studio apartment is nothing to brag about, and you’re one bounced check away from sharing that basement again.
We’d say we look forward to seeing you for the holidays, but we don’t, because seeing you now is just…depressing. Make no mistake, that doesn’t make you deserving of our pity.
May your holiday season bring you nothing – absolutely nothing. The gift you get, but don’t deserve, is the privilege to even share the ice with us.